First off, maybe we need to establish the mood/feeling/sentiment attached to this February 14th anniversary date. In my book, rumor has it there was some guy ‘back in the days’ who was named Valentine. Apparently he was burned at the stake or whatever - like Joan of Arc and etc etc - then given a posthumous medal for valor under fire The said medal being canonization and instatement as St Valentine, the patron saint of whatever. The result today being that today, the 14th February is a yearly celebration of love and affection (carnal or otherwise, more of the former I assume) all over the world (most parts anyway, if you believe the hype).

Hey, I said this was the version I read in my book. ‘Infinity’ is hereby invoked to avoid any irrelevant discussions or attempted clarifications.

So we come to the topic of the day. I will take the perspective that Valentine’s day should be an extra opportunity to showcase your goodwill towards mankind in general, never mind that the term ‘mankind’ refers to all sorts of strange and weird species in real life. Of course, there’s nothing wrong in defining ‘mankind’ as your partners, loved ones, amorous liaisons etc. It’s a free world.

Generally, for most people there are two types of moves that appeal during this period.

We have the guys that pick a quarrel a day or two before the 14th (with the express plan of making up on the 15th or 16th) in order to escape from any suggested extra expenditures from their partners on what they regard as a ’special day’; Hard Move! (HM!).

Of course we have the bright guys who try and take advantage of the notion that Mr. Cupid works overtime on the 14th of February in order to declare their long hidden and pent-up emotional feelings towards those they have been longing after for ages but never had the courage to do anything about it (Frankie Vallie(?); “…my eyes adored you/though I never laid a hand on you/my eyes adored you/…so close and yet so far…”. These guys take advantage of the mood of the day to make the approach. Cards, chocolates and flowers. Good Move! (GM!)

Oh, and those guys who take advantage of the feeling of love in the air to finally bring up the topic of ‘taking the relationship a step further with the most intimate of physical contacts’ (GM!).

Oh yeah, and the incorrigible ones who suggest to their girlfriends “why don’t you bring your sis along for a threesome?”, after all, isn’t Valentine all about ’spreading the love’?

Just kidding, hey, anybody requires some Moves!, give me a shout out.

Happy Valentine’s day y’all.

To make it interesting, not until 12 hrs to go until the 14th Feb  (GMT).

Patience. Good Moves! are always worth waiting for.

nuff said.

Thinking about it, if I decide to vent my true feelings about this ‘valentine’ miasma, the ‘acid’ generated might just eat through this post and corrode this whole blog. But, seeing as I don’t want to bring out Mr. Jekyll tonight, maybe I’ll just go for the ’service with a smile’ approach.

Okay, this is Val season. This is when ‘enterprising’ young guys out there might just need a batch of HM!’s and GM!’s. Hey, feminists out there, please no grumbles. As a member of the male race, I have to focus on advice to my breed. But, that said, I think I might have a few GM!’s in the bag for the ladies.

Watch this space for the Good Move! Guide to the February Blues.

Attributed to Julius Caesar at the crossing of the Rubicon: “the die is cast”.

Ever had that feeling you’ve been ’snookered’? Been roused into motion from your preferred state of inertia by forces you would deem unfriendly/unwanted? Y’all know the popular saying that goes; “between Scylla (the rock) and Charybdis (the whirlpool)”, or in plainer english; “between a rock and a hard place” right? I guess the general assumption is that it is only at certain critical times in our lives that we find ourselves in this precarious position isn’t it? Wrong!

I postulate that we are ALWAYS between Scylla and Charybdis. The only thing is, we are sometimes forced to wake up to this uncomfortable reality, ok, I know; we’d all like to remain in our more or less constant sleepwalking half-aware dream state wouldn’t we? Yeah right. What was that one about ‘pigs’ and ‘levitation’ again?

Anyway, it is at these occassional points of clarity that we ‘backbenchers’ and ‘professional fence sitters’ say to ourselves; “s**t!, these guys have involved me! d**n!”. O’ pitiful man. ‘Involved’ from the moment of birth, just takes time to realize this harsh fact. 

This is the point when we commonly say to ourselves: iacta alea est. “the die is cast”. “in for a penny…etc etc”.

Now, how do we proceed after finding out we’ve been snookered? The Good Move! Guide!!!  Moves galore!, moves galore!

Anybody need some Good Moves! ?

ok, looking at the Good Move! Guide again, what recommendations would it be possible to give a person like Ashley Cole, the Chelsea FC star thet’s been caught off his guard by the ‘Blonde Brigade ‘.

Let’s try: ‘Ashley to Cheryl’; “Darling, you know these things don’t mean anything, they are daily distractions in the life of everyday men and only serve to remind me of how much more important/valuable you are to me than the legion of ‘blonde bubbleheads’ out there” GM!

Or: ‘Ashley to Cheryl’; “Hey lady, I’ve made this painful sacrifice for us, look what Britney has done with the ‘controversial/messed up star’ routine. She’s defying all the stock exchange predictions! Now we can move up the celebrity ladder!” HM!!

Ah…, if only people had full access to the Good Move! Guide.

Some tasty GM!’s for the everyday guy.

Hey guys, try this out. You see a girl you really like, she’s like really extra hot (if u get ma drift) and you’re thinking of the perfect line to grab her attention. You know you probably have maybe one quick chance to make your play. Try one of these:

“Hiya, have you ever considered modeling or doing a movie?” (GM!) vanity, works every time.

“Excuse me, I have a vacancy in my life and I think you’d be perfect for the job” (GM!)

“Hey! Look at me! Look into my eyes!” (HM!)

“Ok I give in, you’ve got my attention. I can’t resist any longer. Go ahead, you can have your way with me” “(HM!)

“Excuse me, please can you tell me why you’re so pretty?” (GM!) more vanity.

Pls note, these are ‘attention grabbing lines’, now, for the ‘chat up’ lines, I’ll have to keep you guys hanging on ’til I feel like gisting some more. (HM!)

Brilliant joke/limerick - “the boy goes; I planned my move thoroughly, observed her route every day and picked the perfect spot and time, I waited patiently behind the bushes and as she walked past I jumped out, grabbed her and dragged her behind.

I ripped her skirt, pulled off her pantyhose; and took out the elastic for my catapult” (HM!!)

Go look for the song by the late great Notorious B.I.G. on the life after death double cd.

Easy call. (HM!!)

We enter contracts every waking moment of our lives. From things as basic as using a form of transport or purchasing a brief refreshment to things as complex as large industrial mergers and spreading democracy throughout the world. But believe me y’all, no matter the type of contract, there is always associated ‘fine print’. That’s the section underneath that’s written in small letters so you tend to overlook it as not being important. Why wouldn’t they say “there’s one born every minute”?

There are two main groups of people that I intend to analyze and possibly categorize their decisions into either GM! or HM!

Group 1: Those that read the fine print, accept the possible consequences and limitations of the contract and decide to go ahead and sign. The ‘for better for worse people’ that actually MEAN IT. (GM!)

Group 2: The Machiavellians that read the print, locate a loophole in it that allows them to break the contract on their own terms, then go ahead to sign with the conscious or sub-conscious intent to exploit the loophole at some point in the future. According to Murphy, the guy that ’smiles when things go wrong’. (HM!)

The following texts are excerpts from Sun Tzu’s classic, “the art of war”.

“Thus we may know that there are five essentials for victory:
(1) He will win who knows when to fight and when not to fight.
(2) He will win who knows how to handle both superior and inferior forces.
(3) He will win whose army is animated by the same spirit throughout all its ranks.
(4) He will win who, prepared himself, waits to take the enemy unprepared.

Hence the saying: If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

(GM’s!) - All self explanatory.